Committment Issues...

So I confess, I may have some committment issues. I just may have some. Idk. This epiphany came to me a couple of weeks ago while I was attending a training for people who are enthusiastic about helping others lose weight.  We were like a cult--lol--all lovers of helping others maximize their potential. It was really funny to see so many other people who had  hearts like you to see others grow, develop, and most of all, be happy with their bodies and themselves as a whole. It was during a discussion amongst this group about maintaining goal weights that jarred my thinking.

You see, my initial goal was 130 (October of 2010) and since then I've lost an additional 13 or so pounds.  Yet, I have kept my goal weight as 130. Normally, you readjust your goals as you begin to feel more comfortable with where you are. But me, I knew I was not returning to 130lbs but  yet I feared adjusting my goal to 120 or something else.  I noticed that when I thought about changing it...the what ifs creeped in or the thought that I would be unable to stick with one thing for a lifetime.    I feared failure and so I did nothing. I didn't commit...because of fear.

It's amazing how fear can just creep in when you aren't even paying attention. I realize during this transition to healthy living that its important to nip things in the bud before they take root and lead to other issues. So here is my uprooting of this fear plant that is trying subtly choke my beautiful flowers. I have decided that I will readjust my goal and stick with it. I know you may be thinking whats the big deal. The big deal is that decisions you make in one area of life often mirror other areas in your life.

Like many, I have been in the situation as it relates to transitioning to healthy living, that I would not commit to anything because of fear. I would let things just happen with no focus because of the fear of committment leading to a failure that I could not handle emotionally. So I did nothing.  Thinking that at least if I did  nothing, I'd really couldn't pin point the blame on me, right?! Well no more!The time is now to uproot those fears and go for the gusto!! Who's with me!! What is keeping you from committing to certain things in your life? Lets get it ! The time is now!:)

April Showers Come May Flowers!!

Wee hee the seasons are changing, the seasons are changing...can you feel it?! I know it has its ups and downs...cold rain here, and sun here and there, etc, but I don't care tho, cause I know whats a coming lol!! Soon it will be summer and with summer comes my favorite fruits!!

I hereby confess that I am a fruit-a-holic.

Check out this uber sexy asian pear!! Am I the only one who gets turned on by this lol!!

Okay back to the subject at hand....alas the seasons are a changing and I realize that for some reason, I tend to want to eat lighter as the seasons change. Anybody else feel that way? So here's a simple fruit roll call for ya.  What are your favorite fruits and veggies and how do you dress them up (you know, make eating them fun)?

Like for me, I love my blueberries in a cup of cottage cheese or in plain greek yogurt (sweetened with splenda).  Oh...and dipping bananas in chocolate and freezing them!!
Sometimes I make a pine-apple and banana smoothie ....
Or I eat little fresh apricots...

Tell me some of your fruit or veggie concoctions!! Lets get it!

Oh side-bar, this past weekend I went to Weight Watcher BLS training (the training to become a fabulous and dynamic Weigh Watchers LEADER) in Boston...hung out with some cool peeps (incorparted them into lifelong buddies) but most of all I learned how to continue to encourage and empower people on this journey to healthy living tee hee!! So watch out world!! Meet the Boston's Best BLS Group eva coming to a meeting room in your neck of the woods!!

Anchor UP!!!

I know its been a while...almost two weeks lol! But I'm back with a bunch of thoughts and ideas.  I will say that recharging and taking time for self to re-evaluate is so necessary...but I digress (but do try it some time:). Ok back to the blog lol!

On the heels of achieving the goal of getting my Group Exercise Certification (thats right, I passed:),  I've been thinking about how my support system has been a staple  in anchoring me towards success. Take for instance, the success of  passing the test for my group exercise certification. I registered and paid for my test in December of 2010, tho the test did not take place until February 14, 2011. However, I sought out support from my closest friends (Shelley B and Tron) as well as my instructors. I found that when I made myself accountable to them that I wanted to stay on track, work harder, and succeed; they were my anchors. Not only that, but I gained a wealth of information from using my instructor as a part of my support system and my anchor.

Now here is the translation that can be applied to healthy living. Sometimes we find that taking the journey alone can be overwhelming at times, easily frustrated and so we may drift/wonder away from our journeys.  I've found that when we choose to be accountable to others, the accountablilty  helps to keep you on track and keep you on your toes. Not only is the accountabilty a great help to keep you on track, but the support from your peers helps push you past those low points becoming an anchor to keep you on task.   So do anchor up and tell someone what your working on so you can find the support you need so you don't drift  away from your goals.You don't have to do everything all alone...and as someone may be the anchor you need, you in turn, can be the anchor for someone else.

I researched this word anchor and here are my favorite highlights of the defnition (ha ha mainly all of them):

1. a heavy object, usually a shaped iron weight with flukes, lowered by cable or chain to the bottom of a body of water to keep a vessel from drifting
2. any device that holds something else secure
3. anything that gives or seems to give stability or security
4. a person who anchors a team, newscast, etc.
5. to keep from drifting, giving way, etc., by or as by an anchor

intransitive verb

1. to lower the anchor overboard so as to keep from drifting
2. to be or become fixed

Who is your anchor?!! and how does  your anchor help:)  you post your comments

Happy Anniversary to Healthy Living!!- I've got the Power!

So this week I celebrate my 1st year of transitioning to healthy living and almost 6 months of maintaining my weight!!  I'm taking time to embrace this accomplishment and my achievement.  I realize that often times we just run past our achievements so quickly but then spend the most  time dwelling on our disappointments or our failures.  But not me!! In honor of my celebration, I'm taking new recommitting pictures to healthy living  (just purchased my new swim suit) and going over what worked for me. It's me week! lol

I am stopping, thinking, acknowledging and celebrating my growth and areas of improvement ( we all need to take a moment to pause for our own cause:).  I've realized in taking this time that I've learned so much.  I've learned that I can commit and accomplish anything that I believe that I can.  I really believe nothing is impossible when you believe! I 've also realized that sometimes the personal journeys you take for yourself that people watch and gleam from you as well and benefit.  That lesson in an of itself has taught me a lot...sometimes all we need is one person and there can be a domino effect.  Just as someone served as a leading Domino in my life, I serve as a leading domino in others effect, and so on and so on...and it keeps going. All is takes is one to commit!

And my commitment to this journey has been a stepping stone to conquer other areas in my life. For instance, I was talking to one of my girlfriends the other day...lol I was having the heebie jeebies (like I wanted to have sex) and my hormones were raging and I got a fine man..lol...I ain't lying...and I was just venting about how hard  it is being celibate.  As I was talking  to my girlfriend, I remembered my transition to healthy living. I was reminded that if I can conquer losing weight (162lbs to 119.2 lbs) then surely I can conquer the heebie jeebies lol and staying celibate. I got the power!!  All that from taking on the journey to transition to a healthier lifestyle.

I could go on  and on with lessons that I 've learned.   This journey has just blessed my life and taught me so much.  To think, I started with just wanting to improve in being consistent and being committed no matter my feelings....but I have evolved to being a passionate person about health, increased self-esteem, confidence, a person who actually loves working out, empowering others...and so on and so on.

So this week...take a moment and pause  and celebrate and honor your own achievements. I know I will:)

I need some me time---

 Let me tell you about a fantabulous woman:) My grandmother, the world's biggest most caring person is known for taking care of everybody and even their grandmother, lol. In fact, the running joke is that when you came home,  you didn't know who was going to be in the house taking residence on the sofa...as my grandmother would often take in family members, people off the street, etc.

Growing up, I saw my grandmother take care of countless people and even heard of her caretaking days pre-Tekeah (you know, before i was born). So keeping that same line of caretaking, my first job out of grad school was a social worker with therapeutic foster care kids...needless to say, I was taking care of other people's childen, and everything in between. I knew their date of births, their last dental, physical, vision, etc. ..all that and then some. I learned as a social worker that when working with people and their lives, something is always going on as people's lives never stop. I mean they never stop!! I also learned during my almost 6 year tenure as a social worker that I created a dangerous pattern of putting others before me.

This pattern left me, sadly overweight, depressed, and unhappy. I can't eat lunch because I "had to do" others people's stuff.  I seemed to always say yes when I should have said no.  As I've transitioned to healthy living, I've realized my worth, my value, and how important it is for me to make time for me and also for me to say no when it is at the expense of my happiness or my mental health wellfare.   Think about this...out of 24 hours in the day, what time have you made for yourself? I know for some you have kids, you have work , you have this....but let me tell you this...because you have all these things YOU MUST plan your ME TIME. You are that important to plan time for you....even if its reading 5 pages of a must read book while using the bathroom (away from the kids, lol,etc). Create that me-time happiness for you---you are that important--and its essential to healthy living:)

Share how you created your "ME" Time space:

I'll start, there is a certain meeting I go to on Saturday mornings, when I could work those days (make some extra money for some future planning lol)...but that time is my time! It keeps me balanced...and unless I'm out of town! I'm there with bells on:)...cuz its my time!

HOw Bad Do You Really Want It!-Losing Weight Ain't for the Faint of Heart!

Just this week I was talking with some of my friends over tea and desserts (shout out to Kenny Wesley for an awesome experience at the O street Mansion) about how today's society with the help of technology robs us of problem solving, patience, and hard work.

What do I mean? Think about this...remember when you were in school and we actually had to physically go to the library to gather information for your research projects and piece the project together. Ahh...the good old times lol.  Now, at the click on an internet button you can get full reports and it takes the hard work, patience, and problem solving, out of research papers.

How about when you would go to K-mart or Walmart and pick out a bike from amongst the models. Then when you rung it up, it came in a box with parts. LOL!  We don't want the parts, we just want the bike. In essence, we don't want to work to put it together, we just want the instant gratification of riding the bike.

In this day in time,  with the advances in technology, I feel like we are unsconciously wired up for the click of the button, instant gratification process and we don't even realize it. Even in transitioning to healthy living and achieving weight loss, a lot of us give up quickly because the process takes tooooo long. We want the weight off now!! Hence, the familiar, I want to lose 20lbs by this month! We don't want to do the work but want the results quickly.  I've definitely been there.  I tried weight pills, the shot (I got sick as a dog), no carb diets, etc.  I wanted it the quick way....and it never worked.  I liken skipping instructions and the process as a person putting together that model bike (looks like the bike), but you realized you have an entire bag of screws left.  The bike is good for a while, but it eventually goes to pieces. LOL!

This tid bit here, healthy weight loss is better  when it comes off slowly  because its more likely to stay off. So lets not skip the process, but rather enjoy it and learn about ourselves. I want to be a model bike with no screws loose so I can endure this ride:)

Don't Quit....:)

Remember, the transition may be slow, the weight loss may be slow, but in the end, it all adds up:)

Post your comments:)

MY DECISION THAT ROCKED 2010 & NOW 2011

Last year in 2010, I made a decision. I made a decision that I wanted to be consistent. I wanted to somehow build my character trait of being consistent.  So I decided to use exercise as a way to form that area.  I decided that no matter how I was feeling up or down that I was going to workout at least 3 times a week. I wanted to have rule over my emotions and that despite how I felt (positive/or negative) I would work out because I committed to being CONSISTENT.  I figured that if I could master this...then I could apply some of the same principles  and be consistent in other areas of my life.

I started with just a decision to be consistent, but I found that in order to be consistent that I also developed some other areas as well: committment, determination, flexibility, discipline, endurance, etc. All that from deciding one thing. So with one decision, I developed other areas and gained insight into things that I never would have even guessed about myself. I would have never imagined that my decision to be consistent would result in the before and after picture that you see now....but it did.

I feel that I have put in work to accomplish last years goal and now its time to apply pressure in other areas. I know now that after having accomplishing this that I have the ability to be consistent in every area of my life that I choose.

How about you for this new year?!! What decision will you stick to or commit to this year?!! Post your comments!

Confessions of a Cake Lover ...

I confess, I confess, I confess!! Christmas got me! I fell off the wagon!! LOL!
You see  on Christmas morning I have this ritual with one of my moms (yes I have several)... that the morning of Christmas, we normally have dessert for breakfast and tea. During that time we sit and talk for hours and catch up on life. I enjoyed it immensely....the convo and the desserts. I was like I'mma do good. I got one slither of home-made carrot cake, and a banana, with my tea. Great! that was good until mom offered a lil slither of sweet potato pie (home made again). Hours later I had another little slither of carrot cake, a slither of home made lemon pound cake topped with a lil bit of home made vanilla ice-cream. DELICIOUS! By that time it was like 2 pm.  Unlike before, where after doing so bad i would normally binge...I decided that I would do better the next meal and eat lighter....and I did.  I had alot of veggies and seafood for  dinner:) to even it out:) The seafood was awesome too:) (My boyfriend's grandmother makes these shrimp stuffed with crab...OMG!!) So I will confess that I did have alot of desserts...but I still won the fight...cuz i didn't stay down:)..finished strong lol!!

I think next year..I'mma sugguest we get a slice of cake for breakfast but have our talks in another room. Its when the desserts are just sitting directly in front of you, that I got weak......it was calling me ..it just be calling me lol (New Jack City ).

Post some of your holiday stories)

ROund 2!! 1-2-3...R U OUT FOR THE COUNT!!

I just finished searching the internet  (google can find almost anything:) for an excerpt from one of my fellow artsy colleagues, Olu Butterfly. I remember doing a show with her and she performed this piece called, Can I Go Back to Your Place. The poem talks about returning to a past love that ended horribly....pretty much going against the grain of logic.  Check out these excerpts...

go back to your place
as if it would be provided
a restraining order
against my stalker: loneliness
back for a second helpin
of fatback soakin in lard
with a side order of bacon, egg&cheese
after i just had a heart attack
is you crazy?

 can i afford to incur more debt
to reenter rehab
to pick myself up
like a flat furry animal
by the side of a highway
& reinsert myself
into rush hour traffic

 
Her words really capture what is approaching us in the next couple of weeks, a decision as to whether we are going to let  unhealthy living return and have a seat at our tables (ha ha food can also be our lovers too).  So many at this time think that since they went out of control for Thanksgiving that they might as well continue on the downward spiral..which I like to think is synonymous with Olu's line "pick myself up like a flat furry animal by the side of a highway a reinsert myself into rush hour traffic."  Just last year, and the year before that, and then some, was how I did things. I ain't lyin! I felt so bad after Turkey day that I was like I might as well continue and I appeased my sadness and guilt for more cake (my love lol).  But that was the old me:) Now I find that at any time, we can stop, make a decision, and do differently. You'd be amazed as to how much a little change will change the outcome of a situation. So I just wanted to encourage you that its not over. At any time, you  can stop, decide to do something different, and get different results. So what say you..?

Are you out for the count? ..or are u getting back in the swing of things:) tee hee!! Lets gooooo!!! Post your comments:)

Somebody almost walked off with my stuff!

Excerpt from poem featured in the movie For Colored Girls Only....

somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff

somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff 
not my poems or a dance i gave up in the street
 but somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff
like a kleptomaniac workin hard & forgettin while stealin
 this is mine/this aint yr stuff/
now why don’t you put me back & let me hang out in my own self
somebody almost walked off wit alla my stuff 
& didn’t care enuf to send a note home sayin 
i was late for my solo conversation
 or two sizes to small for my own tacky skirts

I was having a conversation with one of my sisters, Aiysha, when we were talking about the line from the movie, For Colored Girls,  "somebody almost walked off with my stuff." It got me thinking about this journey towards healthy living and how when we subconciously let unhealthy living literally walk off with our stuff!!

 What do I mean? Think about this----

Obesity/Unhealthy living is highly associated with depression------  
"Somebody walkin off with my joy."

 Being overweight is associated with a low self-esteem----
"Somebody walkin off with my confidence and self-esteem and didn't even tell me?"

Obesity is associated with premature death and sickness and disease-----
"Somebody has sentenced me to an early death and didn't even leave me a note"

So many things we can put there, its crazy. In fact, I didn't even realize all the benefits of transitioning to a healthy life style until I actually did it.  It wasn't until I actually saw results that I made the decision that I was not gonna let unhealthy living walk off with my confidence, my self-esteem and most of all my life. I WANT MY STUFF!!! ALL OF IT! In fact, right now I am redeeming the time from when I allowed unhealthy living to steal my stuff.

My question to you--Are you going to willingly let something continue to take your stuff!!!

Post your comments

I'mma Have My Cake and Eat it Too!!

Have you ever wondered the meaning behind the proverb, " you can't have your cake and eat it too." Well its a figure of speech that means that you can't have it both ways  or you can't have the the best of both worlds....you have to choose one or the other. Well I was using the phrase one time and I thought...why can't I have my cake and eat it too. In fact, I want my cake and I'mma eat it too!! LOL!!

You see, I've realized that what has helped me to be consistent and stay on target as it concerns transitioning to a healthy life style is the fact that I can eat cake!! I can eat my favorites: McDonald's ice-cream cone, crabs, key lime pie, etc.  Yes, I eat all those things and I love them. I'm not on a restrictive diet...in fact, I hereby banish the word diet from my vocabulary. I think the word diet will be synonymous with a curse word from now on.

In my transition to healthy living, I include the things I like in moderation. I don't eat them 24-7, but I do eat them. This inclusion  of the things I like keeps me from going overboard.  I started including the things I like in my transition to healthy living, because I realized that when I constantly deny what I want....when I actually get it, I tend to make up for the lost time that I had been denying myself.  So I said enough with that! Instead of binging on sweets, I have one little sweet a day and that works for me:)

Its funny I remember telling one of my friends when she said I'm not doing any carbs right now and I've been losing. I was like thats good that you've been losing, but you will fail. I couldn't even grab the words to stuff them back in my mouth. I wasn't trying to be mean or anything although it sounded that way. I went on to share that we are living....we are not doing a temporary plan or fix to lose weight...can you live without carbs for the rest of your life? some probably can, but most people can't.  So why start something that's not realistic... lets find a plan that we can actually live with.

But we do that all the time. We try to do a quick fix to make it happen.  I know I have. A certain event will motivate us to lose weight or a certain outfit..and then we're back on the weight-o roller coaster.... well the ride stops here! I believe it is possible to have your cake and eat it too...may take some planning!! LOL but its possible, cuz I'm doing it now!

Thought of the week: When I have denied myself the things I really enjoy...what was the  end result? How can I have my cake and eat it too?
 Share your thoughts and Post your comments

The Fall!!

 I remember when I had first decided to be celibate. It had been two years and then I slipped up. I felt awful horrible and that I had let the world down. I remember telling my parents (yes I told them) and feeling so terrible. I felt so horrible that instead of quitting, I felt well hey I've already messed up, I might as well just keep on going. I remember when I came back to my father and told him it had happened again right after the first encounter...he told me, "Tekeah just stop." Simple words that registered.

How many times have we committed to doing something, but then we fall off the wagon. The fall we take can be so devastating at times that we quit and just give up. When I had fallen that time...I wanted to give up and quit and felt like I could never succeed at being celibate for more than 2 years...so why even try. But my father provided a simple solution just stop and try again.

As it concerns our eating, we may have a ruff day, but we don't have to stay off. We can just decide to try again, have a fresh slate at the next meal, or start again the next day. It takes much more energy to try again then it is to give up. Listen, even a dead fish can go with the flow. So I encourage you, that if you feel like you've gotten off...its cool.don't stay there...try again. It's simple: Just Stop and try again.

Post your comments...let me know your thoughts..and share some stories where you got back up:)

2 Write or Not 2 Write-- that is the question?!!

Its amazing the very power that's in such a little thing as writing. Not long ago I reviewed my planner's over the past several years. You see in the beginning of each planner, I put down the goals to accomplish for that calendar year. I found that the things that I took the time to write down are the things that I accomplished.

Some of them stayed on there from year to year, but eventually were accomplished non the less.

Let me share a personal side bar. In 2008, I made a list of the things that I wanted in my future mate:)....like no smoking, family oriented, saved, speak in tongues, job, etc. Wouldn't you know that this year I crossed off the last item of my future mate list.....in fact, that's what made me go back and look at some of the others things I've written. I realized that the very things I had written, I accomplished them.

I say all this to say that it is proven that the things we write down, we accomplish. We can use this in many areas and I do. Like as it concerns my eating and exercise, I set goals at the end of each week for the beginning of the next week. So on Sunday, I'll set goals like: eat 2-3 veggies a day, drink more water, exercise 3 days a week. etc . Sometimes throughout the week, I feel like I have forgotten them, but when I go back to look at them I realize that I have accomplished them. Subconsciously, I think your mind programs them in...lol.

Challenge of the week: set 2 or 3 goals for the week and then come back and review them. What goals have you set this week! Let me know your thoughts! Post your comments.

*Rolls Eyes* Not today!!

I must say today was a rather long day. I don't know if it was the weather  (very dreary beginning of fall day mixed with cloudiness and rain sprinkles) or what it was, but today I didn't work out this morning. Yes, I said it, I missed my window of time for my work out in the morning. So I went on through my day saying...I'mma work out when I get home. So now, I'm home and you know what....I really don't feel like it. I really just feel like curling up with the Cowboys blanket ( the winning team) and going to sleep.

But just like I challenge others when the going gets rough...I'mma put myself on a challenge. I will work out today, and not go on what I feel, because its what I do. I can't be tossed to and fro like leaves in the wind just because the season is changing (fall is here) or because of my feelings. Its so easy to give way to your feelings though...especially when your a woman...we have extra emotions lol.

I'll be honest with you, I'm probably one of the  most emotional people ever lol. In fact, the major aspect of my job is that I get paid to feel and to empathize and to understand people's feelings (I'm a therapist:). What I realize though is that your emotions can you get you in trouble if they aren't managed properly. You can end up in unhealthy situations because of your emotions: mentally, socially, and physically.  So how do you work on this?!!

YOU TRAIN YOURSELF!!! TRAIN YOURSELF TO NOT BE MOVED BY YOUR EMOTIONS!

So even today, when I don't feel like working out because I'm tired and I want to quickly go to my cowboys blanket. I work out. This is something small, but if you can achieve this small feat than you can use this in other avenues of your life like with your job, kids, mate, etc (when your asked something you don't feel like doing). I don't know about you but I'm determined to be empowered so the transition to living a healthy life style is like a piece of cake  (ha ha no pun intended). So I'm off to the treadmill...with the goal of getting past 10 minutes:) Lets do this!

Challenge of the week: Select one area, could be  exercise, work, school...and complete the task even when you don't "feel" like it! Let me know your thoughts and feelings:) Post comments!

Get Motivated With an Inspiration board!

I believe one of the baddest chicks in the game is Jada Pinkett-Smith. I heart that chick! She's a mother, wife entrepreneuer,  her body is smokin! Because I strive to be all those things: a mother, a wife, a sister friend, have a smokin body, with a smokin man:) (got that check!)...etc. I have a pic of her on my refridgerator to let me know that its all possible.


Now what does Jada have to do with transitioning to healthy living? She's a picture of what can be.... a principle that we can use throughout our journey. I have a pic of Jada, but taking a picture of ourselves, how we wanna look, or even things we want to eat, can be a part of our inspiration board. An inspiration board is helpful for us to strive for our goals and also note our progress. I tell you we are easy to point our areas of improvement, but most times we don't acknowledge our growth and or areas that we've improved. So it's helpful to have visual aids.  So the inspiration board is a very helpful tool:).

Challenge of the week: get a poster board and get crackin...add some pics of how you used to be, what you're striving to be ( I cut off peoples head in magazines and put my head on them lol) take a pic of some clothes you want (that new bikini), include veggies, exercises etc...get creative:)!! Post your comments